Episode 158: Why Perfectionists can get Upset Over the Smallest Things and What you can do?

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Discussed in this Episode:

✅ 5 Categories of ‘things’ that can upset perfectionists

✅ The underlying reasons why Neurodiverse students are upset by small things 

✅ What to do

✅ Why knowing how long is so important

✅ Range of Visuals to Use

Harness Strategies to Overcome Perfectionism Today!

A key part of increasing participation and engagement is getting students to “have a go” BUT……..have you ever noticed making mistakes is particularly frustrating for students with ASD? If so, learn these Strategies to Overcome Perfectionism Today!

This is because people with ASD often have difficulty with “cognitive flexibility” in other words they have a one track mind, their thinking tends to be rigid and not adapt to failure or change. One of the characteristics associated with this inflexibility is being less able to learn from mistakes. Parents and teachers report that the child continues to persevere with an activity, having a mental block and not changing their strategies even if they are not working. An often heard phrase is “he doesn’t like making mistakes” or “he doesn’t learn from consequences”. (Tony Attwood, Asperger’s Syndrome: A Guide for Parents and Professionals, page 117)

When we are trying to engage children or encourage them to participate this “inflexible thinking” can be a barrier to learning. The challenges of “inflexible thinking” are students can make the same mistakes over and over, can’t see an alternative option or opinion, or get frustrated when corrected as they believe they are correct. There are a range of strategies we can use to support understanding and therefore encourage trying ‘new activities’ or ‘having a go’.

• Break activities into small achievable steps.
• Use Social Stories to support understanding (i.e. in Developing Social Skills book “It is okay to make mistakes” page 72).
• Model making mistakes and how to correct (cross out, rub out, etc.)
• Tell what to do, not what not to do. Use positive phrases rather than negative. For example: put your hand up vs don’t call out (see opposite).
• Using range of prompts to support learning.
• Reward having a go.
• Instead of putting an “X” for mistakes, try putting a circle around the mistake and call it “learning”.
• Model your own thinking when things go wrong – “Oh I went the wrong way, what can I do now?”
• Show how to be calm first when a problem happens
• Practice and Model flexible thinking
• Talk about other peoples perspectives. “Why do you think the person pushed in?” “Why do you think Mum set a different flavoured snack?”